there are no updates, not really. I feel like I’m pregnant, but the tests are telling me not. I’m moody, I’m 100% PMT but in my mildly obsessional brain I want to be pregnant again, and if it’s not happening, then I’m kind of cross at all my friends I told about the miscarriage, (and cross at myself for telling them I was pregnant in the first place, or that the miscarriage had happened) who’ve then said “my friend got pregnant again really quickly” and I know it’s meant to gee you up and make you realise it’s not too late, but this is just frustrating not being able to actually BE pregnant. Although on the bad side, I’ve put on weight since Australia, so it’s probably a good job I’m not. Then again, I lost weight when I was. Hmph.

Anyway, Australia. Totally out of the question to try again, as we were in an open-plan place, with my mum one side and Shaun’s the other. So none of that, just more brain-hurt wanting babyness for another 4 weeks.

Oh, and – this mildly obsessional brain thing in my head which wants me to be pregnant. I’ve also done two tests. Probably too far up front, but both have come back negative.

On the plus side, there is always New Year.

On the down side, if I am pregnant, baby would be due at the end of August, so would be in the same scenario as Cathy at school who we called small-child who had her birthday then, so everyone forgot, as we weren’t at school, due to Summer Holidays. We save on child care though.

On the up side, this wouldn’t be the case if we were in Australia.

Anyway, I’m not pregnant, so it’s all hypothetical. Unless I appear here again at the weekend and say “Round Two, ding ding ding”, that is.