Because it wont feel so bad in a weeks time. I’m sure.

So, I couldn’t park in my usual spot, due to the pallet truck being in the way. No major problem, when someone had to leave, I had to shift my car. However, this was not helped by her not helping with the pallet truck – I couldn’t move the thing, partly because of my arm, and partly because I’m bloody well pregnant and shouldn’t be shifting a bloody great big pallet truck (which actually hurt my stomach afterwards, I was trying not to cry in the car, partly through hurt and partly through being bloody terrified I’d hurt the baby).

Anyway, once it was cleared (which she eventually helped me with, initially by standing on the pallet, so I could move the truck itself, oh, and the pallet too) she then drove her car right up to the front of mine, which most of the time I can deal with, but when you’ve about 5cm left to manoevre, and you’re about to crash into the side of the building, or indeed into the pallets, it’s not so great. She left, impatiently (screw her, rude cow), I went to the warehouse, sobbed to them about my situation, asked him to keep quiet about it but if they could make sure the pallet truck is clear, or just make sure they help me move it should I need to (still sobbing), one chap smiled and said “well I guess I should say “congratulations” too!” and I sobbed again, and thanked him, not really focused. Oh I’m so silly and emotional “heh, you’ll have lots of that to come then!” he piped up – I replied “I’ve already had three months of it!” But that was all fine. Headed to the loos for a five minute cry to get it out of my system.

So I go back upstairs and someone put on a Best Of Fleetwood Mac, I was still feeling fragile, put my headphones on to block it out, as the one thing it reminds me of is dad. But it didn’t really work, and eventually I was back in the toilet crying for another ten minutes until I’d got that out of my system. Which eventually worked.

Dearie me. I’m calmer today.

Then I had my digital call later on in the day, and got really cross with everyone because I’d tried to go through things with people earlier in the day, but nobody I needed to talk to was around. So I had a bit of a telling off to everyone, as we’re not having weekly calls any more, more like three weekly. Anyway, after having the fear of checking my emails this morning, it appears that actually I was right, and everything is in fact, fine. So I should have checked them last night (but I was stressed, and had it been bad, I wouldn’t have slept).

So now I feel a bit more positive about today, the last working day when I don’t have to tell anyone I’m pregnant. Thank god.

Add to this that during Shaun’s payday of the last two weeks we were able to put away almost £1000, which is amazing (and fills me full of hope that things will be fine when I’m on maternity leave), and the landlady isn’t going to raise the rent, and today I’m a little more cheery than I was yesterday. Only a little, mind.