We’ve been playing Mario Kart with H – she uses the wheel and Shaun helps her steer. I am very competitive and of course this leads to a cross H; usually when I pip them to the finish line.

She put down her controller.

“oh boo hoo hoo” she said in a really silly cry voice with element of sarcasm while comedy rubbing her eyes, her arms like wings.

Which was a little bit weird. But in a funny way as I couldn’t help but laugh at her – she knows it’s funny.

Her sense of humour is developing quickly. We’re having plenty of jokes made up at the moment.

“why did the chicken cross the road?” “because he needed to”

And of course the words “pants” and “bottom” are the funniest words you’ll ever hear.

Random insults have made their way out – yesterday I was called Eyeball Pants (cue more laughter) by an angry H, though it does remind me of the time I called a classmate a horse. I didn’t want to call her a cow or a pig and blanked out on any other available animal as an insult – you can guarantee she will still remember it if we were ever to meet again as I had the mickey taken out of me for years.

We’ve got a bit bored of reading phonics books so are taking a regular route into the contents of takeaway menus. Last night we worked on indian food and seeing as we get plenty of these things I think we’ll have lots to keep us going. An added bonus is she’ll soon be able to read what she wants to eat when we eat out which is nice.

Regular reading currently comes courtesy of Richard Scarry books which she devours nightly, words for everything which she’s learning and remembering. The new Miffy books are released tomorrow and she still has a bit of Christmas money left over…

Her memory is exceptionally good. Ask her about a story she’s read and she won’t remember that much (I think she’s like me and needs an hour or so to let it sink in), yet she’ll remember a name of someone I’ve mentioned in passing to her or an object several weeks beforehand.

She’s also obsessed with Topsy and Tim moving house on the tv programme and wants to know if “the new people are moving into their old house?” despite having visited the set so she knows it isn’t even a real house.

We watched the second half of the Tottenham game this morning, with me giving in-depth analysis of all the moves and incidents (talk about a good second half to record). We covered maths (how much they need to win by, how many minutes are left, how many players there are), Geography (well, just that Dnipro are from the Ukraine), how nice footballers say goodbye (farewell Jermain Defoe), and how angry footballers will be sent off the pitch (naughty Dnipro man). The main lesson learned was that to score a goal a goalscorer generally needs someone to kick the ball to him.

Afterwards she said “I’m really scared about my next lesson”. I asked why, to which she replied “I might not have enough time to play in the playground beforehand” and looked a bit sad.

So yes, four and a half.