I don’t think I’ve written you a letter for a long time, possibly not since I moved over here from the old place. You’re nearly four, so you’re due a letter.

You’re starting to get the internet and privacy a bit. You asked how I knew the names of other people’s children I’ve never met the other day when we looked through Instagram together. I explained how I don’t use your name any more – you can choose if you want to be named when you’re ready, H will do for now. “But how do you know her if you don’t know her?” you asked, and I think that keeps it simple – I don’t. I just know who they are.

You still find it funny to hide or pretend you’re asleep, then give us a loud “BOO!” when you think we don’t expect it. “tricked yaaa!” is your favourite saying when you play a trick on us both, and more often than not you’ll throw yourself on the settee in a rage when you don’t get your own way (about something which is usually not important to us, but we recognise it’s important to you, like seeing the end of a Ben & Holly episode – our compromise, we record it, you forget about it by the time you’re home anyway and I end up deleting it several months later).

Soon your nursery journey is going to end – today is your graduation but you’ve still got another month before it’s over, finishing there and starting school. I’ll say it a billion times but you being the youngest in the year makes me scared, but I know you’ll cope. You’re bright, a bit shy, but you’ll cope. You just don’t need me around to distract you – whenever I’m around you hide behind me and the confident girl hides away – a bit like when we do pickup in the evening at nursery.

I love that you’ll pick up the iPad and play educational games. The Biff, Chip and Kipper app is one you’ll go back to quite often and one I know is going to help your education. I love that you want to take photos and while you don’t completely understand the blog I set up with your photography, you like that you can show your relatives your favourite photos you’ve taken. I love that you’ll take several photos of the same thing – already you’re doing mummy’s 10% rule; as in 10% of most photos will be some good!

You’ve already been through quite a bit at this age, our regular hospital appointments for your eyes, as well as for your front tooth. I have seen what an amazing little girl you are keeping still for the doctors and consultants so they can examine you – and I’m so pleased you’re this good, this patient.

Nursery say you’re one of the children who everyone notices, without being in-your-face. I like that. I’m wondering if you’ll be like me – I’m liked but I’m not popular, if that makes sense? A good steady person in the background who is always there. Your daddy is like that too – maybe it’s inevitable. That’s got to be good grounding – don’t aspire to be the best unless you know you are the best – aspire to be the best at what you enjoy. Does that even make sense?

Our favourite thing is still cuddles. There’s a definite divide with what we do. Mummy is for cuddles and iPad games, daddy is for playing and reading books. It isn’t like we don’t play, but when you want to do any of those you know which parent to go to. I loved last night when you had the most infectious giggle as we all played in the back yard – I want to hear that giggle more, a really happy little girl who is having fun.

So yes, we’re almost at four. Just a month left now and counting. Your party invites have been sent and most of your nursery friends haven’t replied – that’s okay though as probably after today you won’t see them any more. That must be strange – although I don’t remember who I was at nursery with moving into school. I remember school well, though we were all together for four years so you don’t forget so easily.

The next six months are going to be interesting, challenging, incredible, and most of that is because you’re the one who is leading them. We’re going to have a great time, I promise you.



p.s. I love you when you try to correct ‘three’ from ‘free’ as we try to get some of this London out of you… just a teeny bit, mind.