I have now suitably brainwashed taught H several things

• she knows who The Flaming Lips are (she’ll tell you they’re her favourite band)
• her favourite football team are still Tottenham Hotspur
• ‘Come on You Spurs’ is a very silly song (her words, not mine)
• she knows daddy has a Beastie Boys t-shirt
• she knows what Harry Redknapp looks like (handy if he gets the England job)
• she called daddy a name we’re not allowed to repeat, and then called him ‘Pink’ ‘name we’re not allowed to repeat’. It made me cry with laughing. This is why we’re not allowed to repeat it in the hope she forgets it and doesn’t tell all of daddy’s friends. (for daddy’s sake)
• her ability to cut us down with one liners is getting better daily. She’s two and a half on Thursday. Help.
• she’s finally been to the loo when we’re out with daddy. I always drew that straw (I wouldn’t want to call it the short straw), and decided it was time daddy had a turn. I was waiting a while…